New Season of Absurd

 A 50ss game of Malifaux.

Strategy: Corner Guard the Stash

Scheme pool: Catch & Release, Public Demonstration, Assassinate, Breakthrough, In Your Face

My list:

Seamus2 & Copycat Killer
Madame Sybelle with Grave Spirit Touch
Bete Noire
Dead Doxy with Killer Instinct
Bone Pile
Mourner
Gravedigger

Stones: 5
Schemes: Catch & Release (Bone Pile), Assassinate

Opponent had:

Lynch & Hungering Darkness
Kitty Dumont
Gwyneth Maddox
Mr. Graves
3x Illuminated

Stones: 3
Schemes: Catch & Release (one of the Illuminated), Assassinate

Turn 1:

Since deployment was corner and neither of us had exceedingly fast crews, first turn consisted mostly of positioning. 

Highest card I had in my hand was a seven. I still wanted to try to summon with Seamus, so he punched Madame Sybelle with his bouquet, and managed to land a moderate wound on his henchman with three negative cards... and then proceeded to fail the summon, although I considered I had a pretty good chance of drawing at least an eight with two cards when I tried to summon Rotten Belle. And highest card I had in my hand was a seven, so it was extra insulting that I could have summoned at least a Dandy. Oh well.

I sent Gravedigger to reach strategy on bottom-left. Bete Noire and Mourner were hanging near the middle-left marker behind a building. Ten Thunders had been slow to start their journey, only one Illuminated was within walk distance of middle-left marker. Kitty was behind it.

Madame Sybelle and Dead Doxy were hampered by forest terrain in the middle as they were closing in on middle-right strategy marker. They looked like they'd be facing two Illuminateds and Hungering Darkness, with Lynch and Mr. Graves not too far behind them. 

Bone Pile was stalking Hungering Darkness and Copycat Killer positioned himself so that Seamus had the option of going to top-right marker. 

Turn 2:

Second turn was hilarious in a way - it just might have been my unluckiest turn so far in Malifaux! Fortunately opponent didn't do that well either.

Seamus did succeed to summon a Dead Doxy, though. Undivided Attention from Madame Sybelle, Scarlet Temptaion from Dead Doxy and Urban Legend from Seamus at least made it hell for opponent to do anything constructive in the middle melee. Hungering Darkness and two Illuminated were raining death on Madame, but at the end of turn she was still standing with seven health thanks to some stones, regeneration and healing from Bone Pile.

But the only damage to Hungering Darkness came from Urban Legend.

Gravedigger went to control bottom-left marker, but Kitty came to contest. Mourner had to take two walk actions to go to control middle-left marker because she was just pixels away from getting within 2" of the marker with one walk. Gwyneth came to contest.

Seeing as there were four models opponent had within 2" of middle-right marker, Seamus opted out of the business with Copycat Killer and went to control top-right marker instead. Bone Pile, my Catch & Releaser, engaged Hungering Darkness. But also Ten Thunders scored Catch & Release with Illuminated engaging Sybelle.

Scores go 2-2.

Turn 3:

Resurrectionists win initiative, which means Madame Sybelle and Undivided Attention. She kills opponent's Catch & Release piece. Then Hungering Darkness activates and fails attacks against Bone Pile. It takes another swing and kills my Catch & Release piece with Red Joker on damage. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Since Hungering Darkness activated so early, I decide to kill it now. Seamus charges the beast and fails his entire activation, doing absolutely nothing at all except for Urban Legend.

But killing Lynch's totem was very much a possibility. I really got the distraction machine going, and it was actually a hideous combo I managed to pull off. Dead Doxies took Hungering Darkness "by the hand" while Scarlet Temptation denied Hungering Darkness from cheating, moved it a bit while engaged by Seamus and Madame (meaning unresisted Distracted +1 and a melee attack from Seamus), then Seamus hitting and declaring Bloody Display, pushing Huggy within his own melee range and 1" of Sybelle... 

There were a few annoying failures in the process and Hungering Darkness still didn't die. Although it took all stones opponent had to keep it on board.

Mr. Graves took some interest on Seamus and introduced the master to his fencepost. This took all of my stones and still damaged Seamus for five. Doxy with Killer Instinct was later able to turn the remains of Bone Pile into a soulstone.

Illuminated deals severe damage to Bete Noire with just one attack, so it was time to Fade Away. But then it is free to charge Gravedigger down to two health remaining. I manage to escape with Accidental Roll Over, and as Kitty left bottom-left strategy marker, Gravedigger was able to use Deadly Pursuit to go and control it. 

Kitty, Gwyneth and Lynch bring Mourner down to one health. 

Bete Noire pops up from a corpse Gravedigger had created after accidental roll over, charges Lynch and scores me Assassinate.

Scores go 3-4 for Resurrectionists.

Turn 4:

Ten Thunders wins initiative, and activates Hungering Darkness and heals back to seven health. At least this made it possible for Bete Noire to kill Lynch, who goes down with just one attack. Bete Noire takes second action to bring herself to control bottom-right marker.

Mr. Graves takes unhealthy interest over Seamus again, but thanks to a lucky damage block Seamus still has enough health not to be considered half-assassinated. 

Illuminated on bottom-left kills Gravedigger and controls the strategy marker.

Kitty Dumont kills Mourner and controls middle-left marker. Illuminated in middle kills Madame Sybelle, and Gwyneth tries to kill Bete Noire, failing at that.

Then. It is quite rare that five absolutely crucial duels work in your favor.

There were Illuminated, Mr. Graves and Hungering Darkness contesting middle-right marker and situation was that even if I had all of my models within 2" of the marker, I still wouldn't control it. I only had Doxy, Bete Noire and Seamus alive that were relevant to the scenario. Summoned Doxy and insignificant totem weren't much of a help.

But eventually an absurd plan started to unfold.

Seamus amputates Copycat Killer - check.
Seamus summons Rotten Belle without soulstones or required cards in hand - check.
Seamus succeeds in Urban Legend - check.
Summoned Doxy charges Illuminated so that Hungering Darkness is again under Scarlet Temptaion - check. 
Take By the Hand on Illuminated works - check.
Summoned Belle manages to lure Mr. Graves away from strategy marker - check.
Dead Doxy with Killer Instinct Takes By the Hand Hungering Darkness and pushes it away from marker - BLACK JOKER.

So that was it, then. Or?

Dead Doxy starts to cane Hungering Darkness and first attack deals weak damage and gives Distracted +1. Second attack gets Red Joker for damage. Caning Hungering Darkness dead certainly was less elegant way to solve the problem, but it somehow it worked. So yeah, I lucked out there.

We did not play fifth round, since I got a strategy this turn while opponent did not and could not reveal scheme, so scores went to 3-5. 

If opponent scored strategy and gets a point from scheme, scores would still go 5-6 as I had secured Assassinate.